Sitting, smoking, waiting, thinking
For the phone call that
Could change my life

A blessing
A permanent alter
A lonely call to action
A change to every aspect
A symbol that is pieces of me

made by me
formed by me
loved by me

by my every word
by my every action

Sitting smoking waiting thinking
sitting smoking waiting thinking
sitting smoking waiting thinking
scared.
alone.
nervous.
Butterflies overwhelming
the pit of my stomach
the home of my future offspring

There is nothing to do
but
sit smoke wait think
sit smoke wait think
picture what will happen
with or without you
growing in change
or
changing in growth

what will happen
what has happened

responsible actions
choices in the heat of passion

growing
changing
living
forming

suffering only to
end in blessings

sitting smoking waiting thinking
crying breathing laughing loving

knowing hoping praying feeling
breaking choking gasping keeling

cutting punching kicking screaming
floating pouring grasping mourning

sitting smoking waiting thinking